We’ve all been there. That moment where the wrong words could ruin the
possibility of a peaceful relationship with your in-laws. Manage the situation, manage your
in-laws. Don’t give in to the cliché, to
the expected anger. Instead take a step
back and breathe.
In this scenario: thank your in-laws for taking care of their
grandchild. Wish them a good night and go
home! Once arriving home, tuck your child into bed and away from the
adult conversation. Take some time to calmly
discuss the events of the evening with your spouse. Together decide upon a proper and united
response. Be prepared for some give and
take. There may be points where you may need to agree to disagree.
Remember, parents
know how to get to you even when you are “all grown up” and have children of
your own. So when it comes to your in-laws you may find the gloves coming off in
dealing with their child – your spouse. Keep in mind the position your spouse
will be put in. Be patient. Are you the
adult child? Don’t let your parents sabotage your relationship. It’s okay to go against the need to please
your parents and say no. Respectively
inform them of the unacceptable behavior when it comes to your family. It’s allowed.
It’s important how
you and your spouse end discussions with your in-laws. It’s not a requirement
that you all agree every time. It is
a requirement that you all leave the table with mutual respect and understanding.
Successfully
managing your in-laws by setting expectations, on both sides, discourages misunderstandings. Most ill feelings between couples and their
in-laws can be traced back to a misunderstanding. A misunderstanding you may
not even recall once the bad feelings have escalated.
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